I wantyou back!

I want you back!

Seems you have lost somewhere in the midst,
I want you back somehow no matter with a risk!
I need you right here right now,
I want to love you with my bows down!
Nothing can fulfill my emptiness,
Its only you who can make me feel like a woman!
I will wait for you wherever you are,
Not because you have forgotten me,
It’s because you have loved me!
Your memory might have diminished,
I will rejuvenate it with feelings we have cherished!
Do you remember how far we have come?
It was all real and not just for fun!
You have made me realize what love is?
When I was in confusion and tangled with worst things!
I was trying to figure out differences between love and attraction,
Then you came to my rescue and ignited my conscience with compassion!
You gave me that strength to carry on,
When I was still doubtful and couldn’t move on!
But you showered your love on me which was inside you,
It was so beautiful that I gave myself completely to you!
You cared for me like a daughter,
That gave me confidence to be with you forever!
You were obsessed with my thoughts,
Because I possessed some mediums which were caught!
We talked day and night,
Forgetting that we are losing everything wise!
Our love was so deep that anyone could drowned in that,
But the difference is we couldn’t see that!
Time came when preferences changed,
I lost you without saying a name!
Fight happens between everyone,
But our’s was different which was without any reason!
People told me think twice before you take any step,
I said I don’t need you as I was in complete mess!
I used to cry all day long,
Thinking about what went wrong?
A situation came to my mind,
Where I imagined myself at your place!
If I would have thought that earlier,
Than things would have been completely fine!
But still you did some mistakes which were unbearable,
I tolerated because I couldn’t think of any separation!
Now has the time come?
When I have realized what you are to me,
I cannot leave you for anyone you see!
Time has made me mature enough,
That I can cope with the things better!
I now know how to manage the time,
And keep our relation divine!
I will spray all my love and care on you,
Untill and unless I find someone new!
I don’t know anything except I love you,
And the above 52nd line was just to tease you!
I have leant many lessons of life,
Now I just need a peaceful mind!
I am just waiting for the day when you will be “MY”
That day I will show you the way I first “SHY”
I will continue loving you,
And will wait till death for you!

It's you!!

You are like a fire,
You burn every day!
You are like water,
That makes her own way!
You are a (teddy) bear,
To whom everyone wants to hug!
You are like a monkey,
Who spins all around and eat in a mug!
You are the one, who wants everything,
But sweetheart you have to wait until spring!
You want to live life to the fullest,
It makes you cool and full of zest!
You are the coolest admirer of girls,
Who always look at them through Chinese eyes!
You seem like a crow,
Who love to eat French fries!
You are the mentor of my mistakes,
Who console when time permits!
You appear to be some black magician,
Coz in my mind most of the time you exists!
You always found in the parties,
As if you are on some spree!
You also scream at me,
Just like countless monkies on the tree!
You are what you are,
Who cannot change for anyone!
But who is asking you to do so?
When you don’t want that someone! :P
This is all you and your characteristics,
I am extremely sorry, if I missed any of your chop sticks! :P hahhaha..

I miss you!!

It’s been long since we have spoken,
All my dreams seem to have broken!
You know I can’t live without you,
Then what’s the thing that doesn’t allow you!
I prayed for you day and night,
You were plain ignorant of all my fright!
Today I couldn’t control on my emotions,
And I busted out on the pillow with full devotion!
I cried and cried and cried in pain,
But no one was there to hear my vain!
You promised me to stay with me forever,
But that day you also diminished like a clever!
I don’t know when we are going to speak again,
Until then just pray I am alive to regain!
Why are you doing this to me?
Is this the day we have always dreamt?
I loved you like no one can,
But the thing is you’ll never understand!
I just want you in my life,
Keep all money, materialistic things aside!
I miss you all day long,
Nights do frighten me and I’m gone!
Do you miss me the way I do?
When will the day come when I’ll be with you!
My each breathe calls your name,
Please come back to me it really hurts as I can’t handle the pain!
I wish you’ll understand one day,
The way I am living my life now, won’t come to you any way!

Fashion Is Moving With The Trend Not Just Being Comfortable!

Many people say that fashion is just being comfortable in what you wear but actually it is just a stereo type concept of fashion. Fashion is all about wearing trendy and what is in! Being fashionable simply means wearing high heels, trendy clothes and stylish accessories. One cannot be fashionable in simple lower and top but of course comfortable. Youngsters are becoming more and more fashion conscious these days and they know that being fashionable is not just wearing comfortable outfit or accessories but going with the trend that leaves a fashion statement and impression on the people. One cannot be comfortable in high heels and it demands extra care while walking and same is the case with long evening gowns that needs much attention as well.

So if you want to be chic and remain fashionable then you need to go with the trend rather then searching something comfortable for you. Fashionable people always want to go with the global trend and they always search for something that is “IN” globally. So that wherever they go around the world they will be considered chic and stylish. Cocktail rings are in latest craze among fashionable people. You can perk up your attitude this season with some stylish attire. One can experiment with their eyelashes like using false ones, different colors eye-liners, can wear high heels sandals, and long evening gowns are always in fashion.

You can also go for green, mauve and red colors this season. Black is the color that is always in fashion and goes with every occasion. One should wear those outfits and accessories in which they feel stylish and chic. Comparing comfort with fashion is just very much unfashionable and outdated. Move on with the new trend and stay stylish forever and forget all the comfort level but wear it with cautions!

No Time To Repent
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It is neither an article nor a story, but these are my feelings, in which you may not be interested, but I would urge you to continue reading. My relationship with my mom was very critical as any young adult girl would have. I always misunderstood my mom like hell, but was she worth my ignorance and rude tantrums?

I will be revealing this story because you are with me in this journey and I feel that you should know what the actual meaning of life is and what exactly mother is. It’s well said that whatever you see has two sides, two people may see same thing, but they analyze and evaluate it differently, because different people have different perceptions. Same thing happened with me as well.

I always wanted to live life on my own terms. I tried to do everything, what mom didn’t like. She didn’t like me roaming with those frivolous boys and stupid girls, who always lied to their parents and slept with their colleagues for few bucks to fill their pockets. We did party every night and bunked school and lectures since I grew up. I always tortured and lied to my mom.
I can define my relation with my Mom with a single word, HATE. I hated her because she stopped me from doing everything wrong, yes wrong! She tried to stop me at that time too, when I became a well known doper in my college, I did all this simply because I wanted to hurt her. My mom loved me a lot and I hated her a lot throughout her life! I don’t know why. What was the reason to hate her so much?

It may be because of that childhood memory, which is blurred and still not clear. That memory still haunts me and makes my senses go feeble and blocks my mind. Dad passed away when I was just 3 years old. I was 6 years, when one day I saw my mother going with some other man at night. It was raining heavily and street poured out like well.

I said: “Mom wait, brother is waiting at home and he wants you to be with him, he is not well, he needs you”. I wanted her to listen, to look after my brother and give the care he needed.
My brother had severe fever and he needed mom. But she didn’t listen, and moved on. My brother died. I blamed mom for that. If she would have stayed and treated my brother with some medicines and called some doctor, then he would have been saved. I loved my brother a lot, he was the only possession left with me. We used to cry, laugh and play together. Once he broke my favorite doll but I didn’t say any thing to him because I loved him more then anything in my life. He said-“Sorry, I will bring another one for you” but I said-“it’s ok Nanu!” I used to call him Nanu by love. I continued-“You are more important to me not this doll”. He was very innocent and adorable. I cuddled him like a baby.

Anyways, days passed by and I still couldn’t find who that man was. I tried to ask, but she turned mute. Mom was not well one day and she suffered from cancer. I called doctor but it was of no use because it was too late. She hid her disease from me since years. At night when she was suffering from heavy bloody vomiting, somehow I felt a strange satisfaction in watching her suffer.

I felt, she is paying price of killing my brother. Now my brother’s soul would get some peace. Suddenly a man came out of the limousine and walked towards my mother. She tried to speak but couldn’t talk because of the blood that totally blocked her mouth. She tried to stop that man as if she wanted to stop that man and requested him not to tell anything but the man didn’t listen. He knew my attitude towards my mom. Before my mom could utter anything, she died. The man continued:

“She picked a bud thrown away; many years back from the unknown street of Goa and brought it home. Many people stopped her but she pledged that day that she will turn that bud into a beautiful flower that will make all the scenes of her life beautiful and extraordinary. She knew that her son was ill. She tried to arrange the doctor and medicines, but I came in between, to show her one more bud, which was lying down on the same street.

She came with me and picked up that bud to give her a life, which would be worth living. She did that to save that bud from the paws of those hungry lions that will grind that bud under their feet within no time. You were the earlier bud and now my adopted daughter is the second bud.”

I was taken aback! This is what my mother was. This is what the word mother means! Life didn’t give me a single chance to understand her and when I got the chance, she was no more. I still find myself numb when I think about those days, I want to confess and give that love from which she stayed aloof her whole life. I sit most of the times near the photo of my mother and ask her- “why did she does this to me, why she didn’t tell her problems and given me a single chance to understand her.” When I got the chance then there was no time to repent! The Game was over!

Dead emotions!
Loads of emotions bundled up inside me,
Is there someone who can ignite me?

Ignite me with the fire of emotions within me,
With a great intemperance it is floating around me.

Meticulously hold those emotions and collect it near me,
Then we both will loose it on the funeral beside me.

Funeral beside me is thy funeral of my emotions,
With whom whole world has played and mocked about it.

But know when I had destroyed all my emotions,
I can fly restfully and carelessly,
Because I have resurrected the life again.

I don't care, I don't get hurt now,
Because the emotions inside me are no more now.

Jaroorath
ज़िन्दगी रुकी सी है,
दिल को जरूरत किसी की है..

आये कोई फ़रिश्ता बन के,
शायद तमन्ना एक इसी की है..

थमी हुई सी धड़कन,
अब इस दिल की है..
आँखों को इन्तेज़ार किसी और का भी है..

कशमकश में लूटा मैं सुबह से रात भर,
दिशा ढूँढने को बेकरार अभी भी है..

कहाँ ले जायेंगे मुझे ये दिन और रात,
क्या यु ही चलेगा ज़िन्दगी का कारवां,किसी और के हाथ,

निकले कोई सार मेरी ज़िन्दगी का,
कहीं उम्र बीत न जाये दूंधने में हर लम्हा ख़ुशी का..